I love being a girl. I enjoy the material things-shoes, lip gloss, pink, purses…. I enjoy the emotional things-crying at Publix commercials, getting exciting over a text message, dreaming of your own fairy tale… I enjoy the biblical womanhood things-welcoming protection, submitting, nurturing, responding….
I love hanging out with other girls! Movie nights and ice cream sundaes, dress up dinners with no boys allowed, beach days and Publix subs, long drives to nowhere with the windows down and Kelly Clarkson blaring…
These are all good and wonderful things about being a girl-and I love that this is how the Lord created me. And being a single girl allows me to enjoy these things all the more! My shoes and purses don’t get in anyone’s way, I can cry at the drop of a hat with no one making fun of me, and I get to practice submitting & nurturing & responding. How fantastic is all of this?
But I’ve been thinking…..
If I love it, the girl and the single part, I should love it 365 days a year right? I mean, if I’m content in my current season of life, then birthdays and holidays should come and go with little effect on my heart. Right???
I think all too often, Valentine’s Day rolls around and the single girls of the world unite. We look at it as a day to have fun JUST LIKE all the couples we know. After all, just because we’re not in a relationship doesn’t mean we shouldn’t get to have a fun and memorable evening.
The thing is, when you’re single, EVERY night can be a fun and memorable evening. You don’t have anyone to get home to, you don’t have any diapers to change, and you don’t usually have that tight of a budget.
Numerous girls are planning fun all-girls nights tomorrow, which is fine. BUT….can’t we have a girls night on February 22nd? Or what about in March? My point is this: If your identity is found in Christ on February 13th, so it also should be on February 14th, and 15th, and 16th, etc. Yet, we seem to have this need to focus on our selves on Valentine’s Day-as if to convince ourselves and the watching world that “YES BY GOLLY! We are happy being single.”
Since this will be actually posted on the 14th, it may be a little late. But instead of a day of self-focus, what a wonderful day to be servants! Is there a single mom who might enjoy some company or help around the house or child care while she goes out with friends? Is there a couple who might be blessed by an evening without children in tow? Is there a younger girl who is struggling with her identity in Christ whom you may encourage and serve in some way-without making the focus “SINGLE ON VALENTINE’S DAY STINKS!”?
And if you do go out with a big group of single girl friends, have fun! Laugh, cry, make memories. (And please, take pictures and put them on facebook so I can see all the fun!) Have an evening of biblical fellowship, encouraging one another, speaking truth, and communicating evidences of grace. But please, please, please…from the bottom of my heart I implore you…don’t watch a chick flick. Don’t let your heart be tempted by a fictional character in a movie-he is not real, and no man is actually like that. Christ and Christ alone was the perfect man-not Mr. Darcy or Noah or Prince Charming. The danger of setting up that emotional ideal is all to real, and all too easy, especially on a day of self-focus and self-pity.
Let the focus of the night be Christ’s love. Invite non-believers. Let them see the love that is among you, and declare that love to be the love of Christ-who was crucified and bore the wrath of God, that you might be declared righteous. For this is a love that is better than all the flowers, chocolates, and husbands in the world!
The LORD your God is in your midst,
a mighty one who will save;
he will rejoice over you with gladness;
he will quiet you by his love;
he will exult over you with loud singing
HT: Janelle Leach